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Date: Mon, 26 May 1997 17:22:46 -0600
To: jq@edc.ml.org
From: Cricket
Subject: JQ: Sailor Who? Part 4 Finale

Lookit what I finally got around to posting! *various groans* Part 4, comin' at ya!

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Yup ... all disclaimers as seen in the prologue of this derranged piece apply here also. Members of the JQML are free to archive this if they feel like it.
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Quic Re-Cap:

Everyone turned to see Race's body bounding up the sidewalk.
      "RACE!!" the 2000 team all chimed at once.
      He slid to a halt. "No, I'm Mamoru ... I'm just trapped in this body." He looked to Usagi's body and raised an eyebrow. "Who are you, trapped in my girl friends body?"
      Usagi/Jonny stuck out her/his hand. "Jonny Quest. Pleased to meet you!"

PRETTY SOLDIER SAILOR WHO? : PART FOUR

      Usagi and Makoto ... still in Jonny and Jessie's bodies, bound up thesidewalk, almost out of breath. It had been a whirl-wind day, and you could bet no one's lives would be the same after this little incident was over.
      Together, they picked up the pace, racing up the sidewalk ... past shops andstores, through crowds of people ... followed by a few choice words ... and around the corner, straight into ...
      CRASH!!!
      Mishelle landed butt first on the pavement, nearly on top of two others ...Claudette and Tai-Lee. "Geeze, do you think you could watch where you're going, gaijin!" Mishelle cursed. She stood to her feet, lending a hand to Tai-Lee ... then she noticed who she really ran into. "HEY!! You're the two Quest kids!"
      Jonny still sat on the pavement, legs sprawled out at odd angles. "WAHHHHHH!!! You're just as mean as ... REI!!!! AH!! Is that you?"
      "Unfortunately yes, Meatball Head." Mishelle reached down and yanked Jonny to his feet. "Come on, you ditz!"

      Ki huffed and puffed as he screeched around corner after corner, finally locating the run-away school girls and the run-away Quests. They all stood in the middle of the sidewalk, bent over the Nega-goon, Ghale.
      Out of breath, the agent panted up to the group and flagged down Race. "Oh Mr. Bannon ... "
      "Um ... who you talking to?" Race's body asked, Mamoru's voice.
      Ki blinked a few times, then bent over to catch his breath. Usagi knelt carefully down in the blue skirt and poked at the body on the ground. "Dad!" Jonny's voice called. "Dad ... are you gonna be okay enough to get us all back to normal?"
      "Sure thing," the pile groaned.
      Race stepped forward, and opened his mouth to say something ....
      "HEY USAGI!!!" The whole group looked up to see a short, skinny little boy with swirly glasses coming right for them, waving frantically.
      "Who's the nerd factory?" Makoto's body asked.
      "It's Melvin!" Race/Mamoru announced.
      Melvin bound up the sidewalk and gently slid to a halt. "There you are, Usagi! You know, I've been looking all over for you!"
      Jonny/Usagi just tried to smile playfully, receiving a hard shove from Race.
      "I wanted to know if you'd like to come see my earthworm collection ... me and some friends of my in the science club are going up to the invertebrate display at the museum. D'you wanna come?"
      Jonny raised a feminine eyebrow and tugged on one of the blonde pigtails.
      Rei leaned over and shoved Usagi's body forward. "Of course she wants to go! Worms are your specialty, eh Bleach ... uh, I mean Usagi."
      "Ha ha," Jonny's voice answered. Jonny caught his fault, and immediately threw his voice into a high-pitched, wailly, girl voice. "I mean ... not today ...I've got a *cough cough* cold! Yeah, that's it!"
      Rei/Mishelle about died. "Oh Lord! I'm never gonna let you live this onedown!"
      "LOOK ! THERE THEY ARE!!!" someone yelled from behind them all. The entire group looked around to see some of the Quest team bounding up the street, lead by a pooped-out Jonny.
      Jonny threw his arms open wide and leapt into the air, landing in Usagi'sarms... .... and Mishelle hit the sidewalk laughing.
      "MY BODY!!!" he whined, glomping on to Usagi/Jonny.
      Mamoru's body soon joined the group, Race and Mamoru each looking their bodies over in concern ... then Jonny leapt from Usagi to Race/Mamoru, latching on like a leach. "MAMO-CHAN!!! This is absolutely horrible!!" he whined loudly.
      Jonny reached up and planted a big, sloppy, wet kiss on Usagi ... now inhabited by Race.
      "What the ... " Race's voice cursed.
      "Get offa me, Jonny!!!" And Mishelle turned red from hysterics.
      Usagi/Jonny unlatched her/himself from Usagi and stepped back. "AHHH!!!! Mamoru! What happened to your voice?"
      "Nothing," Race answered from behind her, glaring a bit at Mamoru's own body. Jonny stood between the two, doing double takes ... triple takes ... nearly nodding his/her fool head off as he looked back and forth between the two.
      And THEN he spotted Melvin. "MELVIN!!! Oh, Melvin, you've gotta help us!" Jonny whined, falling down to his knees and crawling toward the nerd, pleading with all he could muster.
      Melvin tipped his glasses, and looked around the group. "Could someone tell me what's going on here?"
      "No time, Melvin!" Jonny shouted. "You've got to work with Dr. Quest ... "he pointed to the pile-o-goon on the sidewalk ... " and formulate some kinda cure for us. WE'VE ALL SWITCHED BODIES!!!"
      Melvin looked at the strange blonde boy before him, then around to the group once more. Usagi and Mishelle were practically strangling each other ... Usagi and Rei's bodies wrestling each other to the ground. "Just cuz you're a girl now doesn't mean I still can't kill you!!!"
      And up the street bound the guys ... Bryce, Hadji and Travis ... screeching to a halt to look around the group of people before them.
      "Uh, hi there," Bryce sheepishly waved to the crowd.
      Haruka, Michiru and Setsuna's bodies waved back.
      "Okay, nerd-boy," Makoto/Jessie said, grabbing Melvin by the collar of his school uniform. "Here's the deal ... "

      Melvin stood before his economy-sized chemistry table in a white lab coat, scrutinizing a formula he had in a test tube. It was thick and green, kinda like swamp water, and he turned proudly with a smile after his examination. "I think I've got it! All you guys have to do is drink this, and you'll all be back to normal!"
      Jessie's body shifted uneasily. "Are you sure it's safe, Melvin?"
      "Oh yes! The chemical make up of the homogenous mixture is very close to the structural ... "
      "A simple 'yes' would do just fine, Mr. Wizard," Rei's body huffed, swiping the test tube. She sniffed it and turned blue. "UGH!! It smells like Jonny's socks!"
      "HEY!!" Usagi's body yelled back.
      "Who will be the one to test this concoction?" Haruka/ Hadji asked, a bit concerned.
      All eyes turned to Usagi's body.
      "Uh ... hey!" Jonny's voice shot out. "No way! I ain't playing guinea pig!"
      "GET HIM!!!!" the girls yelled.
      "WAAHHHH!!!!" Usagi/Jonny turned to flee, only to be tackled by the bodies of all the school girls, wrestling him to the floor.
      "Hold his head still!" Bryce's voice boomed in.
      "I've got his mouth," Travis joined, wrestling around in the woman's body.
      "Hold him still!" Rei/Mishelle tipped the test tub and poured the green gook into his mouth, immediately clamping his nose shut so he had to swallow it. Usagi turned as green as the mixture as she/he swallowed it ...
      .... and the whole room fell silent.
      Mishelle's body stood along side Rei's body. "D'you think it worked?" Mishelle's body asked.
      "One way to find out!" Rei reached down and yanked on a blonde pig tail.
      "YEWOCH!!!" Usagi's voice shot back from her own body.
      "IT WORKED!!!" And so began the stampede for the chemistry table.

      Benton adjusted the ice pack on his bruised head, happy to FINALLY be backin his own body ... in fact, the two teams were overjoyed to be back in their own bodies.
      Michiru cursed, tossing her sea-green hair about. "We missed our calculus exam!"
      "I'm sure I can convince the university to give you another one," Dr. Quest smiled.
      Usagi clung to Mamoru like staticy socks.
      And Jonny zoomed by everyone one, followed by Mishelle.
      "COME BACKHERE, BLEACH-HEAD!! I ain't through insulting you yet!!"
      "Gotta catch me first, Chiuahuah-breath!"
      "I'm gonna kill you with my bare hands ... you Maybeline Mishap!!"
      Jessie sighed. "Yup, things are back to normal."
      "I am NEVER coming back to Japan!" Claudette wheezed.
      "Agreed!"

FIN! OWARI! THE END!

© 1997 Jiminy Cricket Presses

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